Marriage Myths: These ‘Red Flags’ Are Actually Signs of a Healthy Marriage


Frequent arguments may be a sign of good communication. |

Marriage Myths: These ‘Red Flags’ Are Actually Signs of a Healthy Marriage

Most couples haveِ wondered atِ one point orِ anotherِ if theirِ marriage isِ doomed.
It’s noِ secret thatِ halfِ of allِ marriages endِ in divorce.
There areِ certain behaviors thatِ seemِ likeِ red flags atِ first, butِ areِ actuallyِ signs ofِ a healthy marriage.

1. You argue

1 reason couples fear forِ their relationship’s future isِ frequent arguing.
But believeِ it orِ not, fighting withِ your spouse canِ strengthen yourِ marriage.
When doneِ in a healthy way, fighting isِ a great wayِ toِ show thatِ you respect eachِ other’s views enoughِ to hear eachِ other out.

You should be able to talk about the tough things. | Gastonlacombe/iStock/Getty Images

2. You ignore taboos and talk about the tough stuff

The rule ofِ notِ discussing topics likeِ politics orِ religion inِ polite company goesِ right outِ the window whenِ it’s yourِ spouse you’re speaking with.
Being able toِ talk aboutِ tough matters, likeِ divisive politics, death, andِ infidelity, isِ a great sign.
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3. You spend time alone

Sure, spending someِ time solo feels refreshing … butِ it can’t beِ a good sign ifِ you wantِ time awayِ from yourِ spouse, canِ it.
Au contraire, saysِ experts Dr.
Charles andِ Dr.

4. You travel separately

There’s a difference between wanting some quality alone time … and wanting to avoid your partner. | OcusFocus/iStock/Getty images

This oneِ isn’t forِ everyoneِ — someِ people aren’t comfortable takingِ a solo getaway orِ goingِ somewhere withoutِ theirِ spouse.
But separate vacations areِ not a threat toِ your stable, happy marriage ifِ you alsoِ make time forِ shared vacations.
As long asِ you’re notِ doingِ it toِ escape eachِ other, separate vacations areِ fine.

5. You flirt with others

Flirting isِ fun, butِ if you’re married, youِ mightِ feel guilty ifِ you engage inِ a playful conversation withِ someoneِ else.
After all, it’s easy forِ harmless flirting toِ cross theِ line intoِ something more.
In fact, thereِ areِ some experts whoِ claim thatِ flirting withِ othersِ isِ important.

6. You’re not afraid to speak your mind

Traveling together can be fun — but consider solo adventures too. |

This doesn’t meanِ you shouldِ step onِ a soapbox andِ rant aboutِ all ofِ your spouse’s shortcomings.
But relationships thrive whenِ couples canِ express themselvesِ freely andِ honestly.
That means noِ topic isِ off limits, soِ ifِ you needِ to rant, yourِ spouse isِ the oneِ person youِ shouldِ beِ able toِ rant to.

7. You’re sad sometimes

“The word ‘happy’ wouldِ lose itsِ meaning ifِ it wereِ notِ balanced byِ sadness” – Carl Jung Nobody reallyِ likes toِ beِ sad, butِ asِ the sayingِ goes, youِ can’t haveِ joy withoutِ sadness.
Having moments ofِ sadness means you’re experiencing life.
More importantly, you’re experiencing life withِ someoneِ elseِ who isِ goingِ through sad moments andِ will beِ there toِ helpِ cushion theِ blow.

Know the warning signs

Casual flirting can be harmless. | monkeybusinessimages/iStock/Getty Images

Of course, sometimesِ someِ ofِ the aforementioned traits areِ actuallyِ a sign ofِ a bad marriage.
Relationship red flags include a lack ofِ communication, a lack ofِ trust, controlling behavior, orِ a lack ofِ interest inِ working onِ your relationship.
If youِ thinkِ somethingِ isِ truly wrong, itِ may beِ time toِ seeِ a marriage counselor.