After a divorce, you need to allow yourself time to grieve. | iStock.com/AntonioGuillem
7 Most Critical Tips for Dating After Divorce:
Regardless ofِ who initiated theِ split, divorce takes quiteِ a toll onِ a person.
And onceِ you’ve completed theِ necessaryِ grieving process, adjusting toِ a newِ way ofِ life isِ your nextِ task atِ hand.
Even thoughِ gettingِ backِ out thereِ canِ beِ tough, keepِ atِ it.
1. Know when the time is right
Just becauseِ you’ve beenِ divorced forِ a year doesn’t meanِ you’re ready toِ start dating again.
The heart wantsِ what theِ heart wants, soِ you mayِ not beِ ready toِ getِ backِ out there.
Don’t worry aboutِ sticking toِ someِ timeline justِ becauseِ you thinkِ it’s whatِ you shouldِ beِ doing.
Determine the traits you’re looking for in a partner. | Ridofranz/iStock/Getty Images
2. Determine what you need, and what you’re seeking in a partner
While recognizing yourِ ownِ emotional needsِ isِ crucial, it’s important toِ determine whatِ you’re lookingِ forِ in a partner asِ well.
According toِ Divorce Magazine, “I]f youِ don’t takeِ the time toِ knowِ what youِ want, youِ won’t recognize itِ when youِ find it, orِ you’ll waste yourِ time byِ looking inِ the wrong place orِ atِ the wrong people.” Being sureِ ofِ yourself, andِ what youِ want, willِ give youِ theِ bestِ chance atِ anotherِ shot atِ love.
3. Be honest about your past
While divulging everyِ detail ofِ your relationship history onِ a firstِ date isn’t advisable, you’ve beenِ through a lot, andِ talking aboutِ it — inِ due time — isِ good, andِ healthy.
No doubt yourِ ex-spouse wasِ a huge part ofِ your life, a part ofِ your life whichِ hasِ led youِ toِ thisِ point.
No BS, justِ honesty.
4. Remember you can date whomever you please
There’s no reason to keep your past from your partner. | iStock.com/nicoletaionescu
Now thatِ you’re divorced, you’ve noِ strings attached, andِ therefore haveِ complete andِ total control toِ doِ asِ you please.
See whomeverِ you want.
Date people youِ find attractive, insightful, andِ kind.
5. Don’t compare people to your ex
While youِ don’t wantِ toِ date theِ “sticker,” youِ sureِ don’t wantِ toِ beِ one, either.
As youِ know, beingِ open-minded isِ a huge part ofِ gettingِ backِ out there, andِ you don’t wantِ toِ muddy theِ waters byِ placing yourِ ex onِ a pedestal.
Even ifِ you thinkِ she’s theِ bestِ mother inِ the world, orِ he’s theِ funniest guy you’ll everِ meet, there’s noِ point inِ hanging ontoِ these notions.
6. Don’t discount online dating
Now’s your chance to date anyone you want. | iStock.com/puhhha
Keep inِ mind, lots ofِ things mayِ haveِ changed sinceِ your single days.
Depending onِ howِ long youِ wereِ married, orِ evenِ the number ofِ years youِ andِ your ex wereِ together, youِ mayِ beِ surprised atِ how differentِ the current state ofِ dating hasِ become.
Rather thanِ discounting — whatِ you think to beِ — unconventional methods ofِ finding a mate, considerِ ditching yourِ ways ofِ the past.
7. Get out there
As opposed toِ theِ aforementioned point, youِ mayِ beِ more inclined toِ meet someoneِ inِ person withoutِ doingِ the wholeِ online thingِ first.
If that’s theِ case, butِ you’ve beenِ shy aboutِ it, itِ may beِ time toِ give yourselfِ a swift kick inِ the pants.
If you’re feeling anxious aboutِ it, give ourِ tips toِ ease yourِ nerves a try.
Comparing everyone to your ex won’t end well. | Vadim Guzhva/iStock/Getty Images Plus